I didn't want to wake them up...

I wanted to let them stay snuggling together, comforting each other through the night. But alas it was time to get up for school and they were sleeping on the floor next to my bed, which was seriously starting to stink like feet. The floor needs air and they need to wake up.

http://youtu.be/ZRbwjRoQO-M

Ummmmmm...... Whatcha doin????

"Getting my tooth brush😋"

Best thing I've heard all day...

"But daddy, why do we have to have a Halloween candy tax?!?!?"

I lost a bet with a 5 year old

Rhett was screaming something on the other side of my door this morning about being hungry. He asked me if he could make breakfast. I said if you get dressed completely before me then sure. I didn't know the only thing he had left to do was brush his teeth. That's what happens I guess, when you second guess a Maxwell.

It consisted of hard boiled eggs, naan jarlsburg cheese, maraschino cherries, sweet peppers, spicy pickles and carrots. He wanted to add rice with cinnamon, and yogurt with honey but I told him we had to take it easy his first time out of the gate.

Things I said today....

"Your brother didn't squish your eyeball"

"No honey, a monster didn't pee in the dish washer"

"So your telling me we should take a day off of chores? Ok fine, tomorrow we don't eat"

"Will you please stop threatening your brother with scissors"

" No, I don't think that paper plates can fly"

" You are not a football stadium announcer!!"

"They don't make bomb proof bandaids"

"No I don't think I weigh more than an elephant thank you very freaking much!"

" Are you having a conflict with gravity today?"

"Dammit! I said I love you more!"

My life is so rough....

This is our ride to school in the morning. 

Fast forward five years and potty talk is still funny

I started this blog years ago when the boys were very little. Now, they are not so little. Ethan is 9, Caleb almost 8 and little Rhett is five and started school. All of my boys are in school and while this is awesome and liberating, it is also a ton of work first thing in the morning. It is three people yelling that they can't find their socks or that they don't feel good and can't go to school. The other morning, after a traditional later Wednesday evening in which we watched survivor and had pizza, Ethans stomach was getting to him. He said he didn't feel good and I suggested he go spend sometime on the toilet just in case. A few moments later I heard him holler! 

"Ethan! What is the matter! Why are you screaming?!?!"

"It hurts mom! It hurts so bad!!!"

"What hurts buddy. Is it your stomach? Do you have sore bum? You got to help me out here pal"

"Mom.... It's like I'm a bomb and my butt is the fuse!"

I couldn't help it. I busted up laughing even though I know that it embarrassed him. I would full on expect the same from him. One cannot draw such a parallel between that image and the pain they are experiencing without their totally crass mother thinking it's hilarious. You would think the poor kid would learn. However I explained to him that what goes in must come out and to think twice before eating extra helpings of spicy Buffalo chicken pizza if he didn't want to be a ticking time bomb again