Riding in cars with boys

My children are hilarious. They probably get it from me. That's all I'll say about that.

Once again my story takes place in the car. I had just dropped David off at work and was heading for the really bad idea of going to the store on a Saturday afternoon 2 weeks before Christmas. Luckily fate smiled fondly on me and had me in such stitches before I got there that I actually had a pleasant afternoon with the boys. Out of nowhere Ethan pipes up from the back seat holding the long since dead and canceled Verizon cell phone that keeps them occupied behind me with "Command, command. Come in command. Anton, are you there?"
Not entirely sure of who "Anton" is and whether or not I should respond in place of Anton, I wearily turn my head to the side and say
"Hello?"

"Command, we have a serious problem here. I need your help Anton"

Still not quite knowing where this is going but willing to go along (David loves that about me;) I decide to fully embrace the persona of Anton and have fun with my kid.

"What seems to be the problem there..... whats your call sign again?"

"Cand"

"Right, Cand. Ok what is your problem"

"Well command, it looks like someone has stolen the machine. I can probably fix it but I am going to need some tools. Can you get a hold of Crow and send him with some tools?"

"Sure thing Cand. Hang on a minute. Crow, come in Crow. Are you there"

In comes Caleb because I am obviously talking to him. Now mind you this is my feisty child that is moved by no one and if he doesn't want to play then he will make it very well known. And he is two and doesn't enunciate very well. I am his own mother and can't understand half the crap he says. Just think crotchety old woman here.

"I not Crow. I Taydub. I not talking to jew!"

"Sorry about that Cand. Crow doesn't seems to be available at the moment. Is there anything else I can do?"

"Oh man. I was really hoping Crow could help me out"

Ethan looks longingly at Caleb

"I say I not talking to jew!"

"I think you are right Anton. Crow is not going to be much help. Oh my goodness this isn't good. What are we going to do?"

"What's the matter Cand. It sounds like something else has gone wrong. What can I do."

"Oh man. Some one else has taken all the apricot seeds. Now we will run out of food and probably die!"

"Easy there Cand. Keep it together soldier. No one is going to die. Not you, not me, not even Crow over there"

"I SAY I NOT TALKING TO JEW!"

"You are right Anton. I can do this! But we are going to have to stop the space ship so we can re-supply. How long is until landing?"

"Looks like we are going to be at the store, I mean landing spot in about 3 minutes. Is that going to work?"

"Sounds great command. I am going to go prepare for the secret mission."

We then got to the store and for the next 45 minutes it was "Anton, I think we need more apples than that" or "Anton, do you really think we should be getting that chocolate? It is not really healthy and can make you overweight" That is when I really wanted to follow in Crow's foot steps with a "I not talking to jew" but motherly refrain. It was almost funnier to watch the people that started to follow us throughout the store so they could hear the rest of the saga. I think I got stopped 4 times that day with how cute my kids were and how wonderful I was to be playing with them like that. If that is all it takes to get praise and recognition then I think I am going to start acting like a crazy person more often. I felt like a good mom that day and all I had to do was pick up the walkie when someone called out desperately for "command"